Blah Blah:

Iain Duncan’s Pixel Price Preposterous Idea

CGI mutant considering ethnic cleansing.

Alliteration is fun.

Iain Duncan Smith is not fun.

The Jim Jones incarnate has proved that he is totally fucking mental by forking out just over £8.5 million pounds on a 40 second long advert featuring a CGI fat blob thing harassing people in a park because they’re not paying in enough money.

We are never paying in enough money.

The fat blob CGI creature that looks like J.T Sullivan has fallen into toxic waste is meant to represent ‘the physical embodiment of the work based pension scheme’.

‘Workie’ which is the blob’s name is meandering around a park like a pissed up pervert trying to cause public nuisance by talking about money. Sadly for sensible business owners they turn their backs on him or ignore him outright. I guess it’s hard for something that doesn’t exist to represent something physical. That said if someone doesn’t recognise a large blob like CGI monster as a spokesperson for work based pensions maybe they don’t deserve to run a business? (sarcasm obviously).

Ian Duncan Smith is slashing apart the benefit system worse than Edward Scissor Hands slashed that water bed. Ian Duncan Smith is tremendously mental and it is astounding that he is still alive and head of the DWP. The guy is evil and he doesn’t even hide it, he literally has blood on his hands and it seems that the more people he kills or makes homeless the more into madness he falls. Who the fuck thought that this advert was a good idea? The Dean from Community wouldn’t have fucked this assignment up as much as Ian and his army of money snatching Oompa Loompas.

Here is the advert for you to enjoy:


I respect any hired professional Nannies that do not allow the children that they care for to interact with CGI mutant blobs. Also, the advert implies that the Nannies must have bosses, why can’t they be their own boss? Is it because they’re women? For shame DWP.

Maybe it’s Ian Duncan Smith’s imaginary friend? It whispers things to him like ‘Kill the poor’ and ‘no one likes the disabled anyway’.

Let us not forget that this advert cost over £8.5 million pounds to put together. According to The Mirror (take it with a pinch of salt) the total cost of this advert would have helped:

1,725 young people could claim housing benefit.

18,813 people could be removed from the dreaded bedroom tax for a year

448 disabled people could live independently instead of in care facilities

or you could hire some famous footballer (who cares? that’s just in there to help Mirror readers understand things)



This country seriously needs to put an end to the Ian Duncan regime. It’s just a matter of time before adverts start containing references to the time that his uncle probably touched him as a child.

Oh and don’t forget your work based pensions.


About DukeofEarl (74 Articles)
Co-founder and author for The Shonk. Site administrator and general human.

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